My Friend Ken: Miss you buddy.

Me, Ken and Alice in Mexico in the Spring of 2010.

Life has a way of hitting you over the head to get you to pay attention.  And sometimes it grabs at your heart and squeezes to wake you up.  What's the message?  I can't tell you what your's might be, but I know if you open your heart to Mother Life (God, the Universe - whatever you want to call it), she will lead you to what you need to know.  

I had one of those abrupt awakenings on Thursday when I found out that my dear friend Ken passed away suddenly the previous evening.  It hit me like a ton of bricks.  Tom and I were going to see Ken in early August in San Francisco.  That lovable, sweet guy couldn't be gone.

After I had a good cry (I was at a focus group moderator training in Rockville, MD.  I let my class of 6 fantastic women know what had happened and then excused myself to let out a good cry.  It doesn't do anyone any good to keep it in.), I asked myself what am I supposed to learn from this?  The message came loud and clear: LIVE LIFE. There isn't always a tomorrow.  

So, I'm yet again examining my life - our life - to see if we're truly doing that.  Am I present?  Do I love what I'm doing?  Am I connecting with the people I love?   Really, it boils down to prioritizing love over everything else.

Ken and I met five years ago in a two year leadership training course called the Art of Peace.  Our group of nine plus our fearless guides opened up our hearts and souls to one another and now have a bond of love and trust that is beyond words.  The course was based on the idea that you cannot bring peace and leadership to the world if you're not at peace with yourself.  Our two years together culminated in a blessing ceremony in Tulum, Mexico.  Alice was just 3-month old when we headed to a resort in Mexico where there was no electricity, it was wicked hot and humid and the mosquitoes formed clouds around any living being.  And it was a fantastic trip.  The picture above and the one's below are from that trip.  Ken and all of our friends helped me care for Alice.  It really did take a village.  One of my fondest memories of Ken from that trip was Alice's bath time.  I had to load her up with DEET to keep the mosquitoes at bay and sunscreen to protect her lily white Irish skin.  I wanted to get off all of those damn chemicals in the evening and all we had was a shower with water you can't drink.  So, Ken and I went looking for a container and some fresh water to bathe Alice in.  We found a busboy dish tub and asked the cooks to boil some water for us.  Ken lugged the water from the outdoor kitchen to the palapa I was sharing with our friend, Sta.   And then we bathed that little squiggle biggle by candlelight as the sun set.  It was one of many beautiful memories I have of Ken and of all of my Art of Peace circle of friends.  

I love you, Ken.  I know you're in a better place, but I'm still mourning the loss of your physical presence. I know you're holding a beautiful space for all of us and will be there to welcome us when our times comes.  

In closing, I wanted to share a paragraph from his obituary that does a wonderful job of capturing his generous spirit: 

"Ken was a very kind and generous man, who sought to make life better in any way he could for everyone he met. Ken was known by all for his overwhelming generosity. If you wish to honor Ken's life, his family requests that you examine your own life for its many blessings with gratitude, and think of him when you meet someone in need that may need your help. Your generosity in his name will continue his legacy of love here on Earth."

Ken Steininger. June 23, 1967 -  June 18, 2013

Uncle Ken delivering bath water in Mexico  (spring 2010)

3-month old Alice getting her bath in a busboy tub. 

Our Art of Peace group in Mexico for our blessing ceremony.

Spring Happenings | Getting Ready For Summer

I've joked a few times about the two people that read my blog (me and Tom).  Well, that's not entirely true, nor is it fair to those of you who suffer through these posts.  Most of my family reads my blog (but not my mom) and some even send me notes to "get off of my sorry ass" and put up something new (thanks, Joyce - one of my awesome sister in-laws).  Since I'm in full disclosure mode, Joyce *never* calls my ass sorry.  Nor do I think I've ever heard her use the word ass.  That's my potty mouth interpretation of her encouraging notes.

So thank you, thank you, thank you to all of your who read this.  That includes you, Dad and you, too, Kristy!  I could list TONS more names but I don't want to leave anyone out, and I also don't want to sound too braggy.  But, I will say that I can trace IP addresses and there are people who are on my friend list and there are some who, ahem, are not (like my mom).   

By the way, Dad, I hope you like your Father's Day gift of a shout out on my world-famous blog.  You're welcome! 

Getting ready for summer.

We've been immersed in end of school activities, which always leaves me wondering why they save up everything for the last month of school?  Why not move some of those activities to April?  Below is a quick snapshot of what's gone on in Lark's last month or so of school

She was in her middle school Godspell play.  It was an intense run-up to the show, culminating in tech week where all of the cast (90+ kids) practice from 5pm-9pm Monday - Wednesday, followed by four performances Thursday through Sunday.  It was an excellent performance.  I marvel at how they folks who run it are able to include every student that wants to participate in it.  Lark was in one of five casts.  Her cast sang and danced two numbers.  She loved being part of it and can't wait to be in the play next year.  Thanks to all of the volunteer parents and teachers who poured hours into making this happen.  You're efforts have not gone unnoticed and are now immortalized on my world famous blog.  You're welcome!  

And thank you Wisconsin Lynch's (Paul, Sue, Andrew, Wendy, Vivi and Henry) for making the trek to Minneapolis to see Larky Lou's performance (damn, I'm not supposed to call her that anymore).  I blame (and thank) you, Sue, for my two day hang over.  I'm no match for your Wisconsin liver.     

Three days after Godspell closed, Lark was off to Chicago with her school band.  She wasn't even the least bit nervous to be staying in a hotel room with three of her friends and no adults.  She had a blast, as did all of the other kids in the band.  And again, thank you to all of parents who chaperoned and stayed up nights patrolling the halls.  You too are now immortalized on my world famous blog.  You're welcome!

Soccer started this past week for Coach Tom and Lark.  It's Tom's third year coaching her soccer team and let me say that he looks damn good in his soccer shorts and old school Adidas.  He's got killer legs.  I wish he was my coach...what was I talking about?  Oh yeah, Lark's playing soccer this summer.

And that brings us to this weekend and Lark's dance recital.  I just returned from watching her practice tonight and I just have to say, "wow."  She just looks so beautiful up on stage - it brings tears to my eyes to watch her.  I love helping her get ready for dance - doing her hair, helping her with her makeup (I'm not much of a help because all I know are lipstick and mascara and it's a casual relationship at that) and doing all the things that moms get to do with their girls.  I love it.

And what about Miss Alice?  She's just as cute as a button and stubborn as a mule.  The other night she reached for my face, held it tenderly in her little hands and said very earnestly, "Mama, I know I'm supposed to poop in the potty, but I'm not going to until I'm this big [arms reaching as high as they'll go]."  She'll change out of her underpants into a pull up to do #2.   Take away the pull ups you say?  Good idea, except then she just does it in her underwear.

As much as I write about the whole toilet training, I'm not all that worried. I know she'll be potty trained someday.  Right?  Please tell me I'm right.  

Last but not least, I have a new work project with a new client.  Well, it's my good friend, Tacysay, who's at a new company that's rocking the franchise world (note: I've cleverly disguised her name to keep her identity a secret.  Lord knows she doesn't need the riffraff that reads this blog bothering her.)  I'm helping them develop the positioning for a new company their looking to franchise.  Position is just a fancy way of saying "Why choose this company over anyone else?"  It's more than that, but I'm getting bored with myself.

Oh, and Tacysay, not only are you CMO, you are now immortalized on my world famous blog.  You're welcome!